The Three Not-So-Silent Ninjas
Our life is picking up speed and I can't seem to find the brake anywhere. I guess if I ever thought I was getting off this crazy train, I'd better think again. This week has been a complete whirlwind of scheduling, activities, and emotions.
As I shared, sweet Cooper passed away this week at just six weeks old due to complications recovering from his heart surgery. Not only was the loss hard to bear, but it delivered a great big dose of reality right to our front door. We'd planned for these boys to grow up comparing scars and making each other feel normal at family Christmas parties. The truth is Cooper's passing has reminded of realities we'd rather forget. We've become so used to our new "normal," and take for granted McKay and his routine of oxygen, aspirin, and the "no cry" rule, that we forget our concerns are not typical of most two month olds. In just a few weeks I've started to feel like this is the way it will always be~ no worries, no complaining, just our reality. But when we learned about Cooper and the events leading up to his passing, I was jarred into remembering that these kids turn on a dime.
Cassie shared some great victories she and Cooper experienced in his last week here. She was able to feed him a bottle, take a really amazing pictures of him smiling, and was finally allowed to dress him (a really big deal in the PICU because it means there are few enough lines to accommodate clothes and that usually means your on your way home). So how do you go from dressing your baby for the first time on Saturday to making life and death decisions for him 24 hours later?? Not fair.
Impressively, Cooper's mom and dad do not seem hung up on the fairness of it all. They had an amazing photo tribute to Cooper and offered such comfort to all who came to visit. And, honestly, I was doing fine until I came to displays of his personal things~ his blanket, his binky, the only outfit he ever wore; common things all things scattered around my house that suddenly seemed to evoke such reverence. Cassie was still just beaming next to Cooper, so proud of him. And he looked so free. No tubes. No lines. No struggle. And although I hope to never see a casket so small ever again, I must say that little Cooper touched so many lives in such a short time, you have to believe he was an angel on a very specific mission. What an honor to be his parents. We so admire you.
And as life does, it went on at our house. Costumes, candy, missed bedtimes and all. My boys are full of joy and noise...I mean life~what a gift! In addition to trunk-or-treats, neighborhood Halloween parties and more, we hosted our annual soup and sugar cookie night at our home and man did the frosting fly! Here are some fun pics of our week.
What is going on and why am I dressed like this?
The Crew! Our kid's fun neighbor friends.
What secret ninja plot could he be hatching in that chubby little noggin of his? The cheeks hold many clues...
Happy Birthday Grandma Sheri!!