Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Open Letter to Paul Cardall

Dear Paul,

I attended your concert on Monday night (with 2,699 of your fellow admirers). I sat in the 12th row, very near your parents. Black sweater. Skirt. Boots. I'm sure you saw me. We met once before--at Gracie's funeral. I thanked you for being 30-something and alive. My little McKay was just a few months old and I needed to see a boy with a broken heart grown into a man with a pure one. You were inspiring to me then, but Monday night you transcended into something more.

As I stared and wept and wondered at your miracle so eloquently represented through music and video and tribute, I had an epiphany of sorts. And it's that gift of revelation/realization for which I need to thank you.

You see, because you are who you are, because you're living the life you're living, it is not naive or strange for me to cling to the vision of a man with a family, career, and dreams for the future as I think toward tomorrow for my own little fighter. It's not strange because there you are.

It's not foolish for me to think he will have friends, passions, and adventures. It's not foolish --because you do.

It's not wise for me to protect him from life, to shelter, to guard. Your mother let you live and you found reason to keep doing it.

And it's that living, really living, I admire most. Whether my baby gets 20, 30, or 100 years on this planet I pray he will fill his days with the kind of living you've done. Living to glorify the gift of today. Living with appreciation for moments big and small. Living to honor his maker who created him with all the heart he'll every need.

Thank you Paul! Thank you for hanging on when it was more than anyone could have asked of you. Thank you for sharing your journey and your spirit. Thank you for reaching out and changing fear into hope, uncertainty into vision, worry into gratitude. There are so few true heroes on this planet--you are among mine.

With all my heart,
Mindi (McKay's mommy)


jaci said...

Wasn't it wonderful?! He is truly amazing! I had tears also thinking of you and sweet McKay. The concert was so touching. You couldn't have better hero!
Love you Mind!

Katie said...

Such a beautiful letter Mindi. I felt the same and watched with tears througout the entire performance. He is amazing. Anyway, sorry we didn't get to meet up in person but glad we at least got to wave! We waited around the lobby but never found you. So glad we all got to enjoy such a wonderful evening and be restored with HOPE! It was a therapy session of sorts, wasn't it!?!

Heart hugs,
Katie (Maddie's mom)

Whitney said...

If you haven't already sent this to him, send it and sign it. Such a powerful, life-affirming missive should be preserved.

Becca said...

You have such a way with words. We were there too, a few rows away. We should have put a heart on our chests to know who is who. I have always loved that he has the words to tell us what it is like to have a broken heart for these kiddos and to be that example of a thirty something that is still alive.

Becca-Ellie's mom

Sabrina said...

Well, it should not come as a surprise, and in a way it doesn't; but this morning I woke thinking of both you and Paul Cardall. The overall theme of my waking thoughts; I didn't like how busy I had become that I somehow could not even give 2 minutes to catch-up on my favorite blogs (and of course in the case of you, my favorite, period:).

And here your latest entry is *about* Paul Cardall. Funnier still, I've had a post about 'coincidences-or really that there is no such thing' in my head for weeks now.

Miss you Mindi...can't wait to see you...on Patriot's Day.

ann said...

GIrl, you can WRITE!!!

Colleen said...

What a beautiful letter! I have been following Paul's blog for a while. I was so thankful for his transplant and continue to be amazed by this man everyday. He is amazing. What an inspiration he is for anyone whose life is touched by heart defects. I know he gives you so much hope for your beautiful son.